I was awoken just after midnight by DH so he could wish me happy anniversary!! He's the greatest! We celebrated our 4 year anniversary yesterday! The day started off fantastic, receiving tons of anniversary wishes on Facebook and via telephone!
As I was getting ready for my study appointment, I received a text message that I wouldn't able to get off my mind for the remainder of the day. My very good friend, T, was announcing her pregnancy. I replied immediately and then, I cried.
I was surprised by my sobbing. I now understood the feeling my fellow infertiles have been experiencing. I never thought a PG announcement would affect me this way. It really made me stop and think, "What does this mean?", "Why am I feeling like this?". I had to face the reality of how our journey is affecting me and what I'm feeling inside.
I have a very good friend who knows what I'm going through. She battled infertility and conceived twins after an IVF cycle. I called her and she did make me feel better. She also recommended I find a support group, which I may act on.
It was my anniversary and I was going to do my best to make it a happy one, but, honestly, that was extremely hard. The battle we've fought, our journey, the fact that my body doesn't ovulate was on my mind the entire day.
I am 33 years old and have been married to a wonderful man for 10 years. We battled infertility and PCOS w/ IR for nearly 3 years before we received our first BFP in September 2010. Our daughter was born on May 31, 2011. I have two careers. I own a small graphic design business, and I'm also a Certified Medical Coder. ...all while supporting my husband through graduate school.
22 dpo (5 w pg) - Beta HCG is 23 (miscarriage confirmed)
April 28, 2015 - began miscarrying
2nd Pregnancy - Miscarriage of twins
O'ing naturally around CD 20-28 for 6 consecutive mths - something we never experienced before.
December 15, 2012 at 3w5d - Natural BFP! Due: August 26, 2013 Starting weight: 162
6w4d - Two gestational sacs. Both empty.
6w5d - HCG - 19,023
6w6d - Started bleeding and passed a large blob of tissue
7w - HCG - 707 :(
7w1d - Follow up u/s -m/c complete, uterine lining and ovaries appeared normal.
5/31/11 - Aiyana Helene is born! 7 lbs. 7 oz., 20.5 in 6/2/11 - Discharged from hospital - 6 lbs. 14 oz. 6/4/11 - 6 lbs. 15 oz. 6/8/11 - 7 lbs. 7 oz - Back to her birth weight after only 8 days! 6/15/11 - 8 lbs. 4 oz.; 21 inches 6/18/11 - First full on smile in response to Mommy! 6/21/11 - Very first coo's!
8/4/11 - First vaccines; 12 lbs and 22.5 in 8/11/11 - First Chuckle 8/14/11 - First night to sleep in crib! 9/4/11 - Started to grab and pull at her toys! 9/23/11 - Rolled over from back to belly and her first Ranger baseball game! 10/10/11 - 16 lbs. 11 oz.
My First Pregnancy
Aug 21, 2010 - 1st Femara cycle - 2.5 mg (CD 3-7) Sept 7, 2010 - O'd for only the 2nd time in 3 years! Sept 22, 2010 - BFP!!!!
6w2d - Saw gest sac, yolk, and baby 7w2d - Saw HB on u/s 12w - Found HB on doppler (166 BPM) for the first time 14w2d - Doc 80% sure IT'S A GIRL!! 15w4d - Felt first tickle of movement 17w - Feeling taps of movement multiple times a day 17w - Anatomy looks great and it's definitely a GIRL!! 20w2d - Mommy felt movement from outside! 21w5d - Daddy gets kicked for the first time!! 29w2d - u/s - baby could be 3.5 pounds already!! 31w3d - Daddy hears heartbeat w/ his ear to belly! 35w6d - Started to lose mucous plug 36w3d - Cervix 0-1 cm and 50% effaced 37w2d - Cervix same... no change 38w3d - Cervix same... no change 39w2d - Cervix same... no change; Scheduled Cervical Ripening and Induction for June 2nd (40w2d).
40w - Due Date - Aiyana is born!
Our Infertility Journey
Dec 07 - Stopped BCP
Mar 08 - Read TCOYF(Taking Charge of Your Fertility) and started charting
Aug 08 - Started Prometrium to start a new cycle (FAILED)
Sept 08 - Started NPC to start a new cycle (FAILED)
Oct 08 - 2nd attempt w/ Prometrium to start a new cycle (FAILED)
Nov 08 - Added Vitamin B6 and B-complex
Dec 08 - Finally AF arrived after 5 days of Provera
Jan 09 - 100 mg Clomid (CD 3-7); 2 follicles (12-13 mm on CD13); 1 follicle (18 mm) and 1 follicle (14 mm), lining 9 mm on CD15, O on CD18 - BFN
Dec 08 - 1st Sonogram (borderline PCOS, One 1 cm follicle - good news); Bloodwork - slightly elevated testosterone
Feb 09 - 50 mg Clomid (CD 3-7); no monitoring this cycle - No O
Mar 09 - 100 mg Clomid (3-7); US on CD14 found 7 cm Cyst. No more clomid until it goes away.
May 09 - Cyst gone!
June 09 - Cautiously trying 25 mg of Clomid (3-7) - No O
July 09 - 50 mg of Clomid (3-7) - No O
Aug 09-Nov 09 - Participated in Clinical Research Studies for those with PCOS
Dec 09 - Withdrew from infertility treatments and hoping it happens naturally
2WW = 2 Week Wait (the two weeks after ovulation and before AF arrives) AF = Aunt Flo (menstruation/period) B/W = Bloodwork BCP = Birth Control Pills BD = Sex to TTC; Baby Dance Beta = Blood pregnancy test
BF = Breastfeed/Breastfeeding BFN = Big Fat Negative (negative pg test) BFP = Big Fat Positive (positive pg test) BH = Braxton Hicks CD = Cycle Day (before we got PG!) CD = Cloth Diaper
DD = Dear Daughter DH = Dear/Darling Husband DPO = Days Past Ovulation
DS = Dear Son DTD = Doing The Deed (Sex) E2 = Estradiol (Estrogen)
FF = Formula Feed FMU = First Morning Urine FSH = Follicle Stimulating Hormone H&H = Happy and Healthy HCG = Human Chorionic GonadotropinCancel HPT = Home Pregnancy Test HSG = Hysterosalpingogram IB = Implantation Bleeding IF = Infertility IM = Intramuscular IR = Insulin Resistant IUI = Intra-uterine Insemination IVF = In Vitro Fertilization LH = Luteinizing hormone LMP = Last Menstrual Period
LO = Little One LOL = Laugh Out Loud LPD = Luteal Phase Defect M/C = Miscarriage OPK = Ovulation Predictor Kit O = Ovulate P4 = Progesterone PCOS = Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome PG = Pregnant PNV = Pre-natal vitamin POAS = Pee on a Stick (ex, take a pregnancy test) RE = Reproductive Endocrinologist (Infertility Specialist) RRL = Red Raspberry Leaf Tea S/A = Sperm/Semen Analysis SO = Spouse or Significant Other S/W = Software (I use to chart my cycles) TCOYF = Taking Charge of Your Fertility TMI = Too Much Information TSH = Thyroid Stimulating Hormone TTC = Trying to Conceive U/S = Ultrasound